Breaking up with a boy while being nice often takes thought and planning.
Breaking up with a boy is not an easy thing to do, especially if you want to do it nicely and stay friends. Almost everyone has to break up a relationship sometime in his or her life. Everyone has faults, but no one wants to be told what they are by someone they are in a close relationship with. Consider how you would feel if you were in the opposite position; this may help you find the nicest way to break up with a boy.
Instructions
1. Writing down thoughts sometimes make them more clear.
Write a letter to explain why you need to end the relationship. This does not mean you have to give it to him, as it is usually best to break up in person. A written letter helps get your feelings clear and decide the best words to say before saying them.
2. Talking to someone with more experience often helps make better choices.
Talk to a parent or other adult before breaking up. You may get some good feedback, ideas and support for your decision. If there are any reasons to suspect the boy will not be nice in return, talking to a parent beforehand is important. Never let anyone use force or threats to keep you in a relationship. If being nice while breaking up is not possible, do not break up in person and ask a parent or other adult for help.
3. No one wants an audience when breaking up unless it is needed for personal safety.
Tell the boy you are breaking up when no one else is around. Embarrassment in front of his friends is not nice and you are not likely to be friends afterward. Avoid breaking up right before a planned event, such as a dance, holiday or birthday, unless necessary. Consider how you would feel under the same circumstances.
4. Respect his time to adjust to being without a relationship.
Treat your ex-boyfriend how you would want to be treated if he had broken up with you. Do not tease him, pretend you may get back together or tell private information about him. Most relationships involve learning personal information and feelings. Respect his privacy and do not tell everyone all you learned about him while in a relationship.
5. No one likes being told about their flaws or mistakes.
Speak honestly when breaking up with him, but do not be cruel. Someone else may accept a person's many flaws, even if you weren't able to do it. Remember you have flaws as well. Try to realize how you would want to be told about those flaws and how bad they may be.
6. Time allows people to stay friends as long as neither are not abusive or controlling.
Give the boy time to adjust to what you have told him. You have known for a while you are going to break up, but he has just found out. He likely needs time to sort out what you have told him and how he feels. Breaking up nicely takes planning and thought before you do it in order to have a nice ending.
